Thursday, July 25, 2013

Do No Harm

So I have this friend, who has been a pretty constant presence in my life for the past 6 or so years. The past couple years, I have found myself having to spend less and less time with her because of her negativity. And not just generalized negativity, but her desire to actively hurt and make others feel bad (with her words). That included me. She often went out of her way to choose hurtful words to say, when silence or neutrality was an option.

Comments on music I liked, hikes I did, the way I ate, friends I made, etc, etc. Simple, stupid things that just don't need constant nitpicking and negativity.

I purposely put distance between us. And I thought it helped heal, a little. I started to forgive (but not forget). We've had some good evenings and weekends lately, socially.

But then she posted on my engagement photos on facebook: "No Like"

On a thread with all our friends and family saying they loved the photos and were so happy for us and excited for us, there is this little blip of meanness.

Ugh.

I just... don't get people. Why, when it is an option to do NOTHING, do some people actively desire to put negativity into the world?

She could have thought privately that she didn't like them, maybe even tell her husband she didn't like them and I would never have been the wiser. (She later clarified she hates cheesy engagement photos and we looked posed and unlike ourselves -- which I would disagree with HIGHLY, but that's besides the point).

Why put that into the world?

Why make the effort?

It definitely saddened me and hurt me a little. There is no reason to let someone know you don't like their engagement photos. In the past, I've seen people's engagement photos I haven't liked (thought they were too posed and cheesy), and instead of letting them know that, I either chose to say nothing (SUCH an easy option) or I chose to put some love into the world and tell them I was happy for them and they looked happy (not a lie - they did look happy and I was happy for them!).

Be the light you want to see in the world.

I implore the few people who read this to think twice about your words and actions. This girl, unfortunately, brought my good mood down for a little while and caused sadness where there hadn't been any (and hadn't needed to be).

Even if you can not do good -- above ALL, do no harm!!

Namaste <3

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