Friday, June 7, 2013

Why It's Worth It, Reason #465

Sometimes it doesn't seem like it's worth it - all the working out, all the clean eating, all the moderation. People start to stress out about what they are missing: dinners out! drinks with friends! chocolate chip cookies! pizza!!!!

Hell, even in bed the other night, I told Chris that I missed our "bad behavior" earlier this year (where I was putting on a couple of pounds because we were hanging out with friends at restaurants and bars and gatherings and just throwing caution to the wind).... it was pleasurable to be bad like that, IN THE MOMENT. But the next day, and all the days after an indulgence, I was left feeling gross, groggy, bloated and a little worthless.

So what's truly worth it?

Literally the morning after I confided that to Chris, I had this wake up call:

I had to bring the kid I am babysitting to his swim lesson. And I had to wear my suit and get in the water with him because you can have before/after play in the pool but there would be no teacher.

I flashed back to the last time I babysat, about ten years ago and at my fattest (I remember a kid saying my tummy was fluffy like his fat moms ughhhh) and how I would have been HORRIFIED to wear a swimsuit at a crowded pool while babysitting-- but it would of kind of been part of my job.

What a relief yesterday to just take off my shirt and shorts, jump in and have fun!!

There were no seconds of hesitation. There was no looking around to see who was looking. There was no planning to get under water completely as fast as possible so no one would see my body. There was no cringing about the cute lifeguard who had to watch us.

There was just... life.

This is life after weight loss and its SO WORTH IT!

And these are the things I have to think about when I start to falter.

I hope you think about it, too!

Namaste <3

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